The Etiquette of Concord
Volume 2: Customs
The source text defines ulfet (harmony and mutual affection) as a fruit of good character, and estrangement as a consequence of bad character. Brotherhood established for God's pleasure is regarded as one of the most meritorious acts of worship. According to the document, true brotherhood is not merely a sharing of feelings but a legal bond encompassing concrete obligations such as material assistance, keeping secrets, covering faults, and mutual supplication. The text also lays down social ethical rules across a broad spectrum, from honesty in public office to the five fundamental criteria in choosing friends.
Summary
The source text defines ulfet (harmony and mutual affection) as a fruit of good character, and estrangement as a consequence of bad character.
Sections
1. The Relationship Between Concord and Good Character
The text's central argument is that ulfet is not a chance occurrence but the result of moral maturity.
- Root and Fruit Analogy: If good character is a root, ulfet (mutual affection, agreement, and union) is its sweet fruit. Bad character necessarily leads to discord and friction.
- Spiritual Dimension: God has made believers brothers by removing rancor from their hearts as a blessing. This bond is a friendship that continues not only in this world but in the Hereafter as well.
2. The Classification of Love and Friendship
Social bonds among people are examined in four main categories:
| Type of Love | Definition and Characteristics | | :--- | :--- | | Loving for His Essence | Loving a person for his beauty, character, or intellectual excellence, without any other aim. | | Loving for Worldly Benefit | Bonds formed to benefit from a person's rank, wealth, or influence. (Does not fall within loving for God's sake). | | Loving for Otherworldly Purpose | Loves that serve as means to felicity in the Hereafter, such as learning from a scholar or cooperating in a good work. | | Pure Love for God's Sake | Loving without expecting any return, solely because of the person's relation to God (righteous deed, taqwā). |
3. Five Essential Qualities Sought in Choosing Friends
It is emphasized that one cannot befriend everyone, and that "a person's religion is his friend." Qualities of an ideal friend: 1. Intelligence: No good comes from friendship with a fool; one may intend benefit yet cause harm. 2. Good Character: One should also keep away from an intelligent person who is captive to anger, desire, or miserliness. 3. Taqwā (Not Being a Sinner): The friendship of one who does not fear God cannot be trusted, for he carries the risk of betrayal at any moment. 4. Adherence to the Sunna (Not Being an Innovator): The evil of an innovator is contagious; he may lead society into misguidance. 5. Asceticism (Not Being Worldly): Sitting with one greedy for the world increases greed; sitting with an ascetic increases renunciation.
4. The Rights and Responsibilities of Brotherhood
The bond of brotherhood, like the marriage contract, imposes serious rights on both parties. These rights are gathered under eight headings:
- Material Assistance (Right in Wealth): It has three degrees:
- Lowest: Giving surplus beyond need without being asked.
- Middle: Making him a partner in one's wealth (musāwāt).
- Highest: Preferring him to oneself (īthār).
- Active Assistance (Right in Person): Sensing a brother's need before he expresses it and attending to it before one's own affairs.
- The Tongue's Responsibility (Silence and Speech): Covering faults, keeping secrets, refraining from backbiting; and, in return, praising good qualities and sharing in his joy.
- Loyalty (Wafā): Continuing to care for his family and friends even after his death.
Key concepts
- Type of Love
- Definition and Characteristic
- Loving for His Essence
- Loving someone without expecting any benefit, solely for his character or spiritual affinity.
- Loving as a Means
- When the loved person is a path to a higher aim (rank, wealth, or knowledge) that is truly loved.
- Loving for Otherworldly Benefit
- Loving one's teacher or spiritual guide because he has led one to felicity in the Hereafter (knowledge and action).
- Loving for God's Sake
- The highest degree of love: loving everything the Beloved (God) loves, and everyone related to Him (righteous servants, prophets).
- The Source of Concord
- Concord based on *taqwā* and the bond of religion is the most precious in God's sight.
- Harmony of Souls
- Souls are like armies composed of various parts. Souls that recognize one another (that are compatible) agree; those that do not recognize one another fall into conflict. This harmony sometimes stems not from outward appearance but from "inner likeness" and "hidden affinities."
Study questions
What is *ulfet* the fruit of?
It is the fruit of good character.
What are the two things that most help people enter Paradise?
Taqwā and good character.
What is the reward in the Hereafter for taking a brother for God's sake?
God raises that person in Paradise to a rank he could not reach by any other deed.
Why should one avoid a "fool" when choosing friends?
Because a fool, intending to benefit, causes harm through ignorance.
What is "the rank of the truthful" in assistance with wealth?
Preferring one's brother to oneself (īthār).
How should a believer act when he sees his brother's fault?
He should cover the fault, not backbite him, and if necessary offer gentle counsel.
What does describing souls as "assembled armies" mean?
It means that souls created compatible and alike will also warm to one another in this world.